Prima donna is my favorite phrase. It means “first lady” in Italian. Did you know that?

Or, were you thinking about the girl you know that acts like a total stuck up snob?

Well, if that is your perception of her, then maybe she is a true prima donna.

Whenever I get sad, or in a mood, or I forget why I am the way that I am, I remind myself that I am on my way to being recognized as my truest self.

I am over the top dramatic in nearly every way, extremely particular, and I am not afraid to express myself. That is, in my singing, or otherwise.

Now, does that make me a conceited you know what? Why, certainly! 

Before each of my college auditions to get into a top-notch conservatory to be one step closer to reaching this truest self, my darling mother and I would take on the daunting expenditure of going to the mall to find the dress. Oh, and I am not talking wedding dress. This was much more than that. 

She has always taught me that if you feel pretty, you sing pretty. 

Now, some may deplore this behavior, begging me to acknowledge that there is way more to “feeling pretty” than a meaningless piece of fabric, and to that, I would say absolutely nothing.

Because my mouth would be on the floor. I would be too shocked to even respond. How could someone think such a crazy thing? Have you seen my Boston dress?

Of course, it comes from the inside. But, in my world, it is adorned with an A-line flare, a red shoe, a fitted waist, and curls draping down my back. That is my idea of a jolly afternoon. You may think this is ridiculous, but I see it as standard. 

Yes, before every audition, we made this call. This is not to say that I needed to follow the latest trends of each month, because a Bentley dress will always be classic, but for the climate and atmosphere, different dresses were required for different schools.

For Boston, well, actually, there were two different Boston schools… either way, in the middle of January, freezing is freezing, and I had some MAJOR accessorizing to do. So, I matched my utterly fabulous Gal Meets Glam Collection (RIP!!!) cream wool coat with the prettiest crocheted trim gloves and beret.

Fear not, I also had a scarf, to keep my vocal folds warm. Duh! All to match the most perfect navy blue tea length dress. Need I say more about my Marvelous Mrs. Maisel dream come true?

How is there any way I could not sing pretty when I was matched to the likes of Jackie Onassis stepping out of her car in a chilly 1960’s winter? There is absolutely none.

If you know what makes you feel the most you, and you find the things that bring it out in you, why would you not pursue that? 

Do you think that if Jackie were still gracing us today, people would have called her a prima donna? And, yes, I mean in the snarky, misused, modern sense.

I just know she was not worried whether anybody would find her too frivolous or shallow, or mind what they thought at all, for enjoying a matching coat and boot ensemble. It was standard for her, too!

Really, to be a prima donna, you have to know yourself and work really hard to earn that title. Even as it has been misconstrued throughout time, when it really just dictates the leading soprano of an opera house, it still has that connotation. Conceited, even so much as to act in a condescending manner towards others, rude, arrogant, you name it.

Although there are a few that gave the title a bad rap (I am looking at you, Callas) and took their status to an extreme, it is the mark of a truly established woman in the opera world.

I do not mind when a woman outside of this context is referred to as a prima donna, but only if it is said with the intent of recognizing her strength and courage, and all of the other traits that make us women.

How about words like inspiring, admirable, remarkable, passionate, and creative? Now, those are some words I can get behind.

And one day, I know I will be there, too. In the opera way. Maybe I can even out-diva the diva herself.