This coming week will be my last as a freshman in college. 

It has been an indescribable experience.

Although there is much practicing, preparing, studying, and finishing touches to be done, my eagerness for the summer is uncontainable. 

It is so close, I can lose myself in a daydream of feeling sand between my toes and hearing the waves of the ocean lapping against the shore, with not a care in the world but which sundress I should throw on for dinner.

And I do… 

at least eighty six times a day, and that is not including my sleep, where my dreams consist exclusively of blazing sun summer frolicking.

Alas, I have to stay focused for one more week!

There are few things that I can say for certain about this past year of my life. 

For so many of us, it has been challenging, boring, unrelenting, sometimes unbearably so. 

But, I have also found myself in a new environment, albeit under some pretty strange circumstances, a new ebb and flow of college life, and proven myself to be much stronger than I had ever given myself credit for.

Even in times where I felt like I completely forgot myself, and questions like “How did I ever come up with a creative outfit before in my life?” (awful, I know) “What do I even like to eat for breakfast in the morning?” And “Why did I ever decide to come to school during this craziness?” bogged me down. 

I felt the most uncomfortable and unlike myself I have ever been. 

But, as the sunshine has come back out the past weeks, shining its light and dedicating its warmth to my walk to class, and how it is still there, setting the evening in dreamy colors, and seeping delicate life into the morning, the promise that summer will be here before I can bat my eyes and brush my hair, reminds me.

I love to bake for breakfast, and share what I make with my family and friends. It is what makes Sundays nearly bearable. 

I get dressed to present myself to the world in a way that I find entirely satisfying and appealing. It is my little secret, a subtle weapon. When I dress nicely, I feel that way, too. It is as though my inner Bentley really shines, even on the outside. And when she is shining…

she can never be stopped.

And most importantly, I came to school because I wanted to learn everything that a college education could teach me in order to set myself farther on my path to becoming what I have always known I would be. 

Just because it is more difficult to feel them at times, especially in the last year, does not make these things any less true. 

My perfectly polished nails and shiny shoes can tell you half as much as that.

And so, my considerations to you are to remind yourself of the things that bring joy to your soul. 

If you love the wintertime, its crisp air, aloft with jovial spirits in anticipation of the Christmas season, and that sort of thing, I will never understand you, but I will be cheering you on every time you think of whatever it is that you love and keep yourself working towards. 

Also, I will tell you that the only acceptable way to truly enjoy the winter is by moving as close to the equator as possible.

Even though seasons are temporary, the way that they make us feel will last always. Take with that what you will.

Now, back to homework and studying for me.

XOXO